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Clayton Kershaw -- what doesn't he do? Racks up strikeouts, wins awards, makes knives. It's not enough that he has to be a great baseball player; he also has to be great at making knives, showing us all up. We can't compete with that, Clayton Kershaw. C'mon! It's not fair!
We're getting word these aren't actually made by Clayton Kershaw, so ignore everything we said up there.
