In a couple years, they’re going to put me on that one way rocket all the way to the moon!
And I can tell you one thing: I ain’t never comin’ back, that’s for sure. What I mean is, I just found out I’m a finalist for this new “Moon One” project.
All you gotta do to sign up is bring $50 cash to ol’ Weird Ears Willy down the street. He got the connect up there in NASA and he’ll give them your name for you and you’re in! It’s gonna be great.
I mean, apart from the whole science thing, it’ll be nice to get away from my ex-wife and that kid she keeps saying is mine.
So, I ordered these shoes to get myself prepared but they sure don’t feel different from regular old earth shoes. I put them on and I didn’t feel no lighter. I thought I’d be bouncing all up and down this place.
I guess what I mean is these shoes might be good for you fools happy just to run around down here on ol’ mother earth, but they won’t get you any closer to the moon and they sure won’t get me any further away from my child support payments.