WARNING: Please do not actually try to hit golf balls using the distinguished actor and castle enthusiast Jeremy Irons.
"Ready to hit the green, Grentmar?"
"Sure am, Turb."
"Say, your bag is enormous. And … moving. Grentmar, what have you got in there?"
"My new Irons!"
"Your new irons are sentient?"
"My new Irons IS sentient, yes! It's only THE Jeremy Irons wiggling around in my bag as we speak, Turb."
"Wow! Where'd you get him?"
"In London's West End. This is my first day playing with this Irons!"
"I gotta say, I don't know if that Irons is allowed under club regulations."
"Well, I won't tell if you won't, Turb."
"That Irons is pretty noisy, Grentmar."
"True. But did you see him in Reversal of Fortune? What a powerhouse. I assume that's the kind of performance he'll be bringing to the fairway today as I swiftly swing his skull into my Titleist balls."
"I RFFRGRGGR. GRUFFFRR!!!"
"I'm pretty envious of that new Irons, Grentmar. All I've got today are my regular Taylormade Irons. They haven't been in any motion pictures, television shows, OR stage productions, as far as I know."
"Well, I'm sure they'll do the job, anyway. Shall we?"